Morning
by JA Baker
Summary: Goblin Slayer reflects on how much his life has changed since three of the women in it decided that his apparent indecision could only be overcome by compromise on their part. And after so long, they weren't taking no for an answer any more... (rated M to be safe, but no smut)


_If you're expecting smut, you've come to the wrong place._

 _First stab at a Goblin Slayer story, having binged read the first two Light Novels and eight episodes of the Anime._

 _Depending on how it's received, it may well be my last._

 _This would be so much easier if they had proper names..._

 **Morning**

Goblin Slayer woke and sat up, looking out the window to where the sun was only just starting to crest over the distant mountains. He didn't need to wait for the farm cockerell to crow to wake him: unless he'd been injured or otherwise exhausted on a quest, he always woke at the exact same time every morning.

"Goodmorning, Orcbolg." a soft voice came from across the room, and he looked over to where High Elf Archer was pulling on one of her thigh-high boots. She gave him a mischievous smile, "Sleep well?"

"Yes." despite everything that had happened the past few months, he was still a man of few words. "Time to check for..."

"I'll check for Goblins." the Rangers smiled again, "You stay here and... rest up."

She gave him another mischievous smile then glided silently out of the room, lifting her bow and quiver from their customary place by the door. His own sword and shield hung next to them, a sign of just how much had changed.

Yes, a lot had certainly changed since that cold winters night when he had been cornered and told that things were changing. He'd been surprised, that much was for sure, but maybe not as much as he could have been. A lot of people thought he was crazy, obsessed only with Goblins, but that wasn't completely true. No, his obsession was with protecting people _from_ Goblins, no matter what it took. Especially those closest to him. The few people who he let get past the walls he'd built to protect himself from being hurt like that again.

But no wall was perfect, and a few people had found cracks to get through.

The sound of rustling sheets and a faint movement of the bed brought him back to reality, and he looked round to see Guild Girl stiring, hugging herself closer to Cow Girl, who was still blissfully asleep. Not overly surprising, given that they'd spent the night before celebrating her birthday with fresh cider and a cake Priestess had baked. The youngest member of his party hadn't stayed late, choosing instead to travel back to town with Dwarf Shaman in Lizard Priest. The way she'd looked at the four of them and muttered something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like the exact number of years, months and days until her eighteenth birthday told him that his life was only going to get more complicated.

Completed, such a simple word for his situation.

It has been just another morning at the Guild Hall when High Elf Archer had called him up to one of the meeting rooms. He'd followed silently, assuming that it was about a quest, preferably one that involved killing Goblins, but had been surprised to find Guild Girl and Cow Girl waiting for them. The Ranger had closed then locked the door behind him, then joined the other two on the far side of the table. Inviting him to take a seat, Guild Girl had smiled as she told him that the three of them had been talking for some time. He'd done his best to follow, but he was soon out of his depth given his limited experience with relationships. As ever, it had been High Elf Archer who cut straight to the point: they were tired of his apparent inability to decide between them, and as such, had decided to compromise.

He'd marry all three of them, and they'd marry each other.

Perhaps for the first time in his life, he'd been glad that his face was impossible to read behind his helmet, because he felt sure he looked like a deer that had been cornered by three hungry wolves. He knew that he couldn't break their hearts, couldn't stand to see them cry because of him, just as he knew that there was no changing their minds once they decided upon something. He'd simply sat there, unable to speak or move as the three women stood and headed for the door, promising to take care of everything.

The rest of the day had been spent dodging other Adventurers, especially Spearman, who'd looked ready to take his head off before being dragged away by Witch. Word had soon spread, not helping his reputation as a lunatic with, if the gossip was true, odd quirks and tastes. It had been a rough couple of days, not helped by Dwarf Shaman making constant jokes about his situation, but eventually other events had drawn the heat off of him, even if Spearman wouldn't even look at him.

With help from Dwarf Shaman and Lizard Priest, Goblin Slayer had quickly built a new cottage on the edge of the farm, using land he had bought from Cow Girls uncle for an exorbitant amount of money. Which wasn't surprising, given the farmers uneasy acceptance of his nicees choice of husband. Cow Girl, High Elf Archer and Guild Girl had taken over the project the moment the building was complete, decorating and organising their future home with a speed that hinted at just how much planning they'd done before they'd confronted him.

Then had come the warm autumn day that would forever change his life. The new suit he'd been forced to wear felt alien on him: the thin material and lack of even chainmail offered no protection from ambush, and he'd been forced to leave every single one of the his weapons at home. He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so utterly helpless...not counting that morning at the Guild Hall.

Lizard Priest conducted the ceremony with help from Priestess, calling on any Gods present to bless the unusual but not entirely unheard of union. The promises of free food, an open bar and seeing Goblin Slayer out of his customary armour ensured that most of the local Adventurers attended, with even Spearman seemingly enjoying himself, right up until the moment when Witch caught all three bouquets. The glint in her eye raised the hairs on the back of the young warriors neck, and he had quickly retreated to the bar and attempted to drink Dwarf Shaman under the table.

Then came the wedding night.

Goblin Slayer knew that, no matter what happened in the future, no matter how dark the caves he ventured into, or how cold the nights on the road travelling too and from quests, he would always have his memory of that night to keep him warm. He'd been somewhat concerned about just how things would work out, but his brides had yet again decided for him in advance, so there were no arguments or bruised egos.

Several of the other Adventurers, most notably Spearman, had tried to get details out of him, but he stoically refused to even offer a grunt to agree or disagree with anything he said. It wasn't helped by the fact that all three of his wives were noted to have a discernable spring in their step, or the way they would greet each other with a kiss when they met around town or at the Guild Hall. Priestess had been increasingly withdrawn and depressed, until High Elf Archer took her to one side and whispered _something_ into her ear that even Goblin Slayers excellent hearing had failed to pick up. Whatever it was, the light returned to his young companions eyes, and Goblin Slayer had suffered a sudden an uncharacteristic flash of fear as she had almost skipped out of the Guild Hall to visit the temple she had grown up in.

The Ranger had refused to disclose just what had been said, but there had been a notable increase in giggling between his wives that night.

Life soon fell into a comfortable routine: every morning, before dawn, he'd rise, don his customary armour and check the farm for any trace of Goblin activity the night before. It was something he'd taken to doing when he first started renting the old, disused barn, but somehow, being married made it all the more important to him. Sometimes High Elf Archer would join him, and his other two wives had sometimes joined them, interested to learn something that might save their lives that day. On the days she worked, Guild Girl would rise early, eat a quick breakfast and head into town on the small pony Goblin Slayer had brought her for the purpose. If she wasn't working, she'd help around the farm and maybe spend some time painting, a lifelong hobby that Goblin Slayer had no idea about before they married.

Goblin Slayer and High Elf Archer would make their way into town a little later to check out the latest quests and check in with the rest of their party. A couple of times a week, Cow Girl would join them, pulling the handcart loaded with milk, butter and cheese to sell. High Elf Archer had chastised Goblin Slayer for making her pull the heavy cart, but Cow Girl had insisted that she enjoyed the exercise. Despite that, the Ranger would often insist on helping if there was a heavier than normal load.

Much to High Elf Archer's relief, Goblin Slayer had relaxed his stance on non-Goblin related quests enough to occasionally agree to something different, or at least with a reduced chance of encountering Goblins. If a quest came up, they'd either head back to the farm to pick up any extra supplies or equipment they might need, or simply head out immediately. He never said anything about it, but on those days, Spearman always walked Guild Girl back home, even after his relationship with Witch grew from partners to lovers.

Ground rules had been put in place for when Goblin Slayer and High Elf Archer were off on a quest. They weren't prohibited from sharing a bed, but out of respect for the other members of their party, they avoided intimate relations unless they were staying at an Inn. Likewise, Guild Girl and Cow Girl made it clear that they were happy to keep each other company at home while their husband and wife were away.

Despite Spearmans innuendo, life in the little cottage wasn't one of constant debauchery: most evenings were simply spent enjoying each others company. High Elf Archer had an unexpected talent for the lute, and while Cow Girl was nowhere near as experienced, she had some skill with a simple flute. Coupled with Guild Girls amazing singing voice, something she had previously been too timid to share with anyone, and their home was often filled with music and songs as evening fell. Goblin Slayer found he enjoyed listening to them, often as he read a book, looking for something new to use in his never ending quest to rid the world of Goblins.

"Goodmorning." Cow Girls soft yet vibrant voice brought him back to the here and now, and Goblin Slayer looked back round to see he propped up on her elbows, a smiling Guild Girl curled up at her side, "It's been two weeks..."

"Yes." Goblin Slayer nodded, even as he took in the enormity of what she was saying.

"I'll have to go into town and visit the midwife to be sure, but..." Cow Girl almost blushed as Girld Girls had came up to rest on her still perfectly flat stomach.

"Two for two." Guild Girl grinned mischievously, "Me last month, now her." she planted a soft kiss on her wife's shoulder, "When are you going to give our Ranger a little something of her own."

"They are leaving on that quest to explore some ruins tomorrow." Cow Girl smiled coyly, "I'm sure they could find a nice Inn with a big comfy bed along the way..."

"Maybe I want to be there for it?" Guild Girl pouted somewhat unconvincingly, "It's a joyous thing, bringing a new life into our family."

"True." Cow Girl admitted thoughtfully, "But we don't want her to miss out, so maybe a little special attention, away from any...distractions, is called for."

"Good idea." Guild Girl agreed, then turned to look at their husband, "I suppose we'd better makes the most of him being here while we can."

"That sounds like an excellent idea." Cow Girl smiled, letting the sheet that had only just been covering them slip, "What do you say, husband?"

Oh yes, life was complicated...

 **The End**


End file.
